Friday, September 14, 2012

Christian What??????????

I was reading an article in Charisma online magazine and have been noticing of late the deviation away from real biblical truths. I posted this response here!!   No wonder the negative affect on myself and so many others! It's depressing!!!

This news source is becoming a modern day representative of the new testament Pharisees and Sadducees. If Christ were in the flesh today, he would come in with a whip and beat sense into a whole mass of "Christians". The raw lies as well as the implied untruths that flow ad nauseam from the so called "right" is extraordinary! There is very little that is "right" about what is being presented these days to the world and to our children. I am embarrassed for and appalled at what is being sold as representation of biblical Christian principles. Father God help us to repent and turn from our wicked ways and heal our land. This is our only hope.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

My Other Therapist

My only sister is Dee who lives in Rockford, IL. She is 2 years younger than I  and when I get almost rock bottom I call her. I believe she is the only person in the world that can get a real laugh out of me when I am lower than a snakes' belly. It must be because she is my spiritual sister as well as my biological sister. My parents had 4 boys and 2 girls so that causes us to be closer than usual. I know she prays frequently for me  and knows me probably better than anyone, even my lovely husband Reggie. I thank God for these 2 persons in my life because they recognize that my diagnoses does not make me "crazy". Others in my family have been known to use that term for me and not in a lovingly jokingly way. 

People don't get it. I didn't get it even though I worked as a mental health nurse for a lot of my nursing career. It wasn't until I sat on the other side of the desk as a patient and not a health professional that I "got it". I use to hop in my car and drive 700 plus miles by myself in a heartbeat. Now it's been almost 3 years since I have driven on an expressway. I can barely drive up the street without having anxiety bordering on panic attacks. The longer I can't drive the harder it is for me to try. My husband doesn't allow me to go anywhere by myself. God my head is hurting. I feel nauseous. I don't know what to do with myself today. I tried to lay down and couldn't. I tried to watch TV and couldn't. I couldn't read or work on any crafts or anything today. Thank God for spell-check, otherwise this post  would be full of errors.

I will continue to believe for healing until I die. I have to have hope. Thank God for my doctors, therapists and meds. Later, Jan

I wonder if I feel "blue" because it's 9/11? I doubt it.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Come Let Us Reason Together

 This is my prayer of faith for healing from depression, panic attacks, anxiety, hypertension and abnormal kidney function tests. And just in case I missed anything it is all inclusive according to the word of God. I share this with all who desires healing for themselves or others.

“Heavenly Father, your Word declares that Jesus took my infirmities and bare away my sicknesses, and that by His stripes I was healed. It is your will to heal me, and it is my legal right as your child to possess it. I take authority over all sickness and disease in my body in the name of the Lord Jesus. I break all inherited generational curses of infirmities, and I command spirits of infirmity to come out of me now in the name of Jesus. Sickness and disease, leave my body in the name of Jesus. Spirits of oppression and depression I rebuke you as the Lord God  rebukes you! Father, I come boldly unto the throne of grace, and I take hold of your healing power. I thank you that your healing power is flowing into my body, healing me now! In Jesus’ name, Amen.”

By praying this prayer, you have released your faith, and healing is flowing into your body. Continue to pray this prayer until the healing is completely manifested. Don’t waver or doubt.

Scriptures To Build Faith For Healing and Deliverance
  1. And if you are Christ’s, then you are Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise.” (Galatians 3:29)
  2. “If you diligently heed the voice of the Lord your God and do what is right in His sight, give ear to His commandments and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases on you which I have brought on the Egyptians. For I am the Lord who heals you.” (Exodus 15:26)
  3. And the Lord will take away from you all sickness, and will afflict you with none of the terrible diseases of Egypt which you have known, but will lay them on all those who hate you.” (Deuteronomy 7:15)
  4. “So you shall serve the Lord your God, and He will bless your bread and your water. And I will take sickness away from the midst of you. No one shall suffer miscarriage or be barren in your land; I will fulfill the number of your days.” (Exodus 23:25)
  5. He sent His word and healed them, and delivered them from their destructions.” (Psalm 107:20)
  6. “He also brought them out with silver and gold, and there was none feeble among His tribes.” (Psalm 105:37)
  7. “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits: who forgives all your iniquities; who heals all your diseases …” (Psalm 103:2)
  8. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He guards all his bones; not one of them is broken.” (Psalm 34:19)
  9. For I will restore health to you and heal you of your wounds,” says the Lord. (Jeremiah 30:17)
  10. “O Lord my God, I cried out to You, and You have healed me.” (Psalm 30:2)
  11. He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds … Great is our Lord, and mighty in power …” (Psalm 147:3)
  12. “And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)
  13. But those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing.” (Psalm 34:10)
  14. “For the Lord is a sun and shield; the Lord will give grace and glory; no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.” (Psalm 84:11)
  15. “The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” (John 10:10)
Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7) Be relentless!!

Much love and blessings, Jan

Thursday, July 19, 2012

A Great Reminder

"Father, I want to thank You for Your faithfulness in my life. Forgive me when I let fear and doubt take over my heart and mind instead of choosing to trust You. Give me eyes to see the treasure buried at the heart of every storm and help me to choose joy -- even when I don’t understand what You are doing in my life. Teach me, Lord. Let my life be an illustration of Your strength perfected in my weakness." ~ Mary Southerland
I was struggling today following a very emotionally exhaustive yesterday. I stayed home while my hubby went to visit my mom at her nursing home. I came across this prayer on facebook from  here
I hope this helps your day be better and brighter! Blessing, Jan

Sunday, June 24, 2012

Thank You

To God Be The Glory! Thank you Teresa, Deborah Ann and Debbie! What a blessing you ladies are to me!
There is a song by a well known longtime gospel singer, Edwin Hawkins, that glorifies the Lord so sweetly. It is on my other blog with my music listings. It is called "To God Be The Glory"! Teresa as you so eloquently remind us that God is to be praised in all things no matter what!

Today is my sister's birthday and I give thanks to the Lord for her life! Happy birthday Sis!!! Teresa we have more in common than you know! I too weep before the Lord at the suffering and anguish of so many in the world today. Especially for the children! Lack, abuse, neglect, confusion, peer pressure, fear, hurt they are subject to so many atrocities! I have always told the Lord that somehow I want to be a blessing to the needy children and women as I can so relate to their sufferings! He led me to a gallery in Fort Myers that is owned by an organization that helps domestic violence women and children, the homeless and victims of human trafficking which is a big problem in the world and even here in S. Florida. Every piece of art sold gives 30% for the funding of the center. Once a year there is a huge auction event and the artists are asked to donate an item to be auctioned off. Perfect for me to be able to bless someone from the fruit of my hands. I pray to be able to  give more and more to this organization as we are blessed to be a blessing.

Stay well my friends and God's best to you all! Much love, Jan

Thursday, May 31, 2012

A New Work In Me

This is almost a journaling type of post for me. I am so inconsistent with my posting and doll-making. It is due to my constant struggle with major depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. It wears me out to try and push myself to do things. I will have a period of time where I can produce but so much of the time it is a huge struggle! In spite of routine meds and therapies,  I have to fight my way out of a black hole, or struggle to prevent being dragged into this monster hole. Sometimes the suicidal thoughts plague me and it is if I am warring with a "HULK" sized entity. It really pisses me off because I am being robbed of so much living!  Thank God for Jesus and for my hubby! What would I do without them?

I used to be such a high functioning nurse, wife, mom, nana, daughter, sister, friend and child of God. I also deal with PTSD(post traumatic stress disorder from sexual abuse during my childhood. I was molested by a much older brother at ages 7-9 and by my eye doctor when I was 12. I wonder if people realized the damage they do to the lives of others with their abusive violations would it prevent so of it from happening? It is so destructive to the victims quality of life. One day I will elaborate on the effects of PTSD as a sexual abuse victim.

Many times it is difficult to even do my activities of daily living. Most days I spend in my pj's and usually need to push myself to wash up and dress. I watch a lot of TV because it takes very little effort to curl up in my favorite recliner with my "blanky". I t is difficult to be around a lot of people especially kids because they are so noisy!

Even my time with my grand-kids is severely limited because of my poor tolerance for noisy activity. The visits to my mom at the nursing home is my biggest sacrifice of effort. She's almost 92 with dementia and medical issues so we don't know how long she has with us. Visiting with her sometime gets on my 'nerves'. My hubby is so incredibly supportive and encouraging me to spend time with my mom. Sometimes he goes to see her without me and takes her special treats.

I feel that God is working somethings out in me and and it will be beneficial to document as I can. Maybe someone else will be blessed to know that they are not alone in these type of struggles. I pray a lot and read the bible. It helps! I watch Christian TV which is also beneficial. I very occasionally am able to attend a church service. Sometime I have to take an extra Ativan or 2 in order to travel to places especially where there will be a lot of people. It also makes me somewhat drowsy.  I shudder to think how I could try and cope without God and His word.

I try to focus on praying for others and being supportive via the internet. I believe that one day I will walk out into the other side of this bizarre place. Like Jesse Jackson says I must  "keep hope alive". Sometimes humor helps too! And yes, even born again Christians have these type of challenges! Love you!